State of the Empire: Address 2023 – The Dark Winter of Finlandia

My Empire has been attacked by a mortal enemy, the United States Government. They have finally decided to make their move on me. In a 3 pronged attack they landed a massive blow to my empire.


Prong #1 – Take Central Offline

On the night of March 3rd 2023 the government, in cahoots with NASA, turned on their weather control machine in attempts to disrupt the Empire’s communications through an aggressive snow storm. Their attempts were successful.

Finlandia, the capital of Evan’s Media Empire, where our central core(NAS) is, was knocked offline 3 times in rapid succession. 

We were quickly back online, but something had changed. No device in the empire could connect to the Central Core. Efforts were made to re-establish a connection, but none were successful.

It seems the EME.CC’s external housing unit malfunctioned and was unable to power up properly.

This means, we have lost access to quite literally all the media that makes “Evan’s Media Empire” what it is. This is a massive blow to not only our expansion efforts, but the very foundation to which my empire is built on. You can’t have a media empire with no media. 

The Central Core had every aspect to EME, work, clients, personal work/projects(art, writings, photography, journals, databases, products), storage for irreplaceable family/friends photos & videos, pretty much everything. As an emperor drunk with power and booze, I grew extremely sloppy. While the size of my Empire expanded, so did my arrogance.

NO BACKUP, not one. To like 12 years of data. How stupid of an Emperor could I be? This is just something I did not foresee happening, but it’s no excuse to not have a backup of this amount of data, a mistake I will not make in the future. I was weak and the US government exploited that weakness. Now I am going to pay dearly.

Something of which I may not be able to do.

Prong #2 – Disrupt Financial Infrastructure

The 2nd prong of their attack focused on intercepting my mail and dismantling the dynamic linking of my financial infrastructure. 

Nothing was coming in and the Empire was bleeding fast. I drove to the financial institution to figure out what was happening. It took quite a bit of work with an IT specialist to get things sorted. There were brief accusations of fraud, but I shut that shit down quick cuz I came with receipts. It was weird how hostile they were, like they were trying to get me for something. Fuck em, i leave.

Prong #3 – A Beautiful Mind.

On my way home I got pulled over by an officer for not having an updated registration sticker on my plate, something I HAVEN’T GOTTEN IN THE MAIL, but filled out months ago. They wouldn’t hear my story, I was being dragged out of my car and thrown in the back of his. Before I knew it I was in a small holding cell. No one would tell me anything. They didn’t feed me shit. After 48 hours they kicked me to the curb.

This was the 3rd prong to their attack. Get me held up for 48 hours so they could take something from me without me stopping them. I can’t get much into this, as it’s on-going, but they took a beautiful mind from me. I will not stop until I get it back. 


As my energy levels have been depleted and I stand among the wasteland of ash that used to be my Empire, one would safely assume it has fallen. They would be wrong. I see ruins on the horizon, a place I can rebuild. It will not be easy and I will not be able to rebuild alone. 

I have reached out with an olive branch to a pocket of resistance within the state of California. I have secured the Central Core and set it on course to them. The treacherous journey from our lands to theirs will take a few long days. From there the core will be examined by a team of experts in a lab adhering to proper protocol. Any data that can be extracted, will be extracted.

My empire is completely in the hands of foreign entities. It is very nerve racking. They will require a lot of gold for their efforts. Now that I have access to my stockpile this won’t be a problem, but it will certainly hurt my empire’s expansion, and push back a big upgrade I had lined up for the dojo. 

It also puts all the current drops I was working on, basically on pause. So that’s a real shame as I had some incredible stuff in the pipeline.

So while we endure the great wait. The schedule will be shifted around. I’m going to be writing quite a bit. I will be launching some new projects that I had planned to start later, more on that soon. 

Biden wasn’t lying when he said this was going to be a dark winter. I have healed the damages of the 2nd prong, but it’s the one I cared least about. Gold is nothing compared to the other 2.

I’m kind of feeling lost, in limbo of sorts. I guess it was inevitable, you can only operate at those high levels I was feeling for so long in a mortal body. Even Goku couldn’t hold Super Saiyan 3 forever. When you’re down you never think you’re gonna be up and when you’re up you never think you’re gonna be down again. But life goes on.

-Dopely

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