I never ate tide pods as a kid. I guess that’s some sort of achievement these days. We did snort some pretty stupid stuff though. My friends and I were at a burger king when someone dared me to snort a line of salt.
Not one to back down from a dare, I did it. I immediately regretted it. Snot was running out of my nose like a dam fountain.
I was heading to the bathroom to try and control this monsoon of snot. On my way to the bathroom, I’m holding all this snot together, and I hear a (very sexy) voice go “is that Evan Beale?” (like i live in a small town or some shit)
Great, I could not look out of embarrassment, but I can only assume it would have been my future wife had my friends not chosen to ruin my life with a line of salt.
