Evan's Media Empire

EVAN BEALE

aka Dopely Faded

Award Winning Multi-Media Artist | Writer | Content Creator | Political & Pop Culture Commentator | Philosopher | Conspiracy Theorist | Emperor 

AGE: 29 POWER LVL: OVER 9000 PERKS: BEAUTIFUL, CHARMING, FUNNY, AND INTELLIGENT. 

My name is Evan Beale. Im 29 years old. Im an Artist living the Dream. I live in Indiana. I like long walks on the beach, being outdoors in general, skateboarding, snowboarding, swimming, along with other various activities.

My Best Friends Ruined My Life with a Line of Salt

I never ate tide pods as a kid. I guess that’s some sort of achievement these days. We did snort some pretty stupid stuff though. My friends and I were at a burger king when someone dared me to snort a line of salt.

Not one to back down from a dare, I did it. I immediately regretted it. Snot was running out of my nose like a dam fountain.

I was heading to the bathroom to try and control this monsoon of snot. On my way to the bathroom, I’m holding all this snot together, and I hear a (very sexy) voice go “is that Evan Beale?” (like i live in a small town or some shit)

Great, I could not look out of embarrassment, but I can only assume it would have been my future wife had my friends not chosen to ruin my life with a line of salt.

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